1. YES ….. BUT LISTEN!
(By Sue Bailey, Wotton-under-Edge TC)
We're cutting, we're cutting
Its surplus, you say
Budgets need slashing
We can't do it this way
We need to change
Get more for our money
Don't worry, tomorrow
Will still be sunny ….
But toilets are closing
And needing repair
Fewer places for elderly
To dash in despair
Streets no longer cleaned
Weeds are invading
Road craters appearing
Improvements need some translating
Where can kids play
Rough ground's become housing
Developers are king
High St shops turn vacant
In little market towns
These used to be
Cotswold jewels in crowns
But hey the Government has said to us
Don't forget your powers, keep up, don't fuss
Localism we gave you and Powers to raise
Taxes to spend, then you get the praise.
Stop complaining, excessively strutting
Go take the services that we are cutting
A dowry to take them?
Oh don't be silly
Political climate's still
A little chilly
Just do your best
Pat on the head
Scapegoats are needed – take it as read……
2. ANOTHER YEAR - PARISH THE THOUGHT!!
(By Richard Crighton, Newland PC)
Once again we come to May
The start of yet another fray
Time to make the Chair's selection
First item is for their election
'Swear' them in, get 'em to sign
Praying that they won't resign
The last thing that you want to do
Is repeat it all in month 2
Come the autumn, time to start
To crunch the numbers; it's an art
Can we balance next year's budget?
Or will we have to simply fudge it!?
December really is the saviour
No meeting (time off for good behaviour?)
But January soon comes around
"Where's all this money to be found?"
Newsletter: time to get adept
At 'selling' the increase in the precept
It's only a few pence every week
It's but a pittance that we seek
So here we are at the end of the year
"What's been achieved?" do we hear?
Everything we said we'd do
Who are we fooling? Not you.
All those things we do for you
Are guided by the statutes true
The LGAs are manna from heaven
Particularly section 137
That's another year completed
Are the coffers really depleted?
But this is where we seek a plaudit
On completion of the audit.
Perhaps next year it's Quality glory
But that would be a whole new story
We know we're good, we're truly resilient
And, what's more, we're flippin' brilliant!!
3. THE ALLOTMENT HOLDERS' TEN COMMANDMENTS
(By Robert Stone, Twyning PC)
1.) Thou should respect thy Committee for its word on is final once it has communicated and consulted with allotment members and neighbours.
2.) Thy should work with thy Committee to maintain thy allotment for the common good.
3.) Thy should not act by "divine" right to bugger up thy neighbour's land, property, path, drainage or light.
4.) Thy should never enter thy neighbour's allotment or path with heavy machinery of any kind without the prior consultation & warning by the Committee.
5.) Thy should never dump rubbish on thy neighbour's allotment.
6.) Thy should never damage or destroy boundary hedges or trees and walk away without a thought of apology or recompense.
7.) Thy should never extend thy boundaries beyond thy plot.
8.) Thy should never pinch or damage thy neighbour's produce (or sheds and contents)
9.) Thy should never block boundary paths (but be aware that grass footpaths going through allotments are subject to change of cultivation in exactly the same way as any other part of an allotment).
10.) Thy should above all respect thy fellow allotment holders and do by them as thy would expect to be done by. To do otherwise is to invite unhappiness and conflict!
4. HE OF FRUSTRATED VEIN
(By Robert Stone, Twyning PC)
It has been said that we
live in interesting times,
If so it has been men that
have made it so,
We of that gender are marked
out by needs and passions,
striving to achieve but often
marked out by lack of ambition.
Some men accept the status quo
banding with others to accept
a common theme.
Others stand out independent of
mind and view,
Some seek to love and be loved,
but there are those who are
blind to such things,
neither seeking popularity nor a
rather a lonely pathway
of singular view,
pursuing aims by force of will.
Concensus and discussion not
so much feature as belong to
Set agendas and predetermined
aims in said month become directives
that most feel powerless to debate.
Such were born to dictate and self rule.
Pause for a moment and you will
find you know one such as he,
A team player no, but he can
clearly see the direction he must take,
and it takes a formidable player
to change his course.
People such as this are talented
and not often wrong,
but when they are they can have
great difficulty in saying sorry
and moving on.
More ordinary beings need such
dictators to decide what is to be done.
Thinking is not for them.
Security comes from
one who leads,
and all is well
until prejudice and stubbornness set in.
Worry not, change comes to all
for do we not live
in interesting times?
5. NOT UP TO SCRATCH
(By Robert Stone, Twyning PC)
Jack's the name, and grave digging is my trade,
I ply my profession far and wide,
Little do most know that at the end of the day
All share common planting.
Equality is my policy, and diversity universal.
A hole is a hole
When all is said and done
Yet you may be surprised to know
That a man can take pride in moving soil,
In its own way skills and knowledge are required.
For it wouldn't do, wouldn't do at all,
If unbeknown Mr Jones was buried with Mrs Brown
But stranger things do happen
Then unhappiness sets in
Size, shape and position of plot
Are all an exact science before
Anyone goes in.
In days gone by when I was a younger man
All depended on spade, shovel and muscle.
Now I have a van and digger
And must not just perfect my task
But arrive on time and depart
Before the world is aware of my art.
Even then there is more to this job
Than meets the eye,
Sensitivity about damage to
Other long term residents,
And health and safety have their place
After all it wouldn't do, wouldn't do at all
If someone of limited sight
Or unseeing took a fall
For six feet means what it says
And once ventured in new residents
Are intended to permanently reside.
You may be surprised to learn
That I rely in turn on John
The grave digger's mate.
Whilst we rarely meet he is in great demand
His task is even more discreet
For you see he has to patiently wait
Until all is quiet and calm.
Then he comes along for what comes out
Must be shovelled back
Not a glamorous task but one with
Its own skills none the less
For account must be taken of settling
To ensure that all looks well
For the dear departed.
I know I can depend on John
To do his task
But there will come a day
As sure as sure
When I shall require personal
Services from another,
Then I shall look down with my practised eye,
And woebetide my successor
If my plot is not staight and square
And not up to scratch,
For us gravediggers have standards
And must complement one another!
6. TO LIVE IS TO LEARN, AND BY LEARNING WE LIVE
(By Robert Stone, Twyning PC)
Our culture and society is complex and
Underscored by unwritten rules and etiquette,
Whether consciously or not, these affect
Our thinking and self worth
To such an extent that those who
Contribute in a modest way
Think twice before talking of
A job well done, and
Those who really have much to say
Dismiss that role lightly with few words.
This reticence is less
Restrained when describing
The achievements of offspring,
Parental pride then shows as
Exams are passed and careers developed.
Other nations are of course less restrained.
Indeed, even here inventive job titles
Are catching on, and
Luxury motor cars, and personalised
Number plates flourish.
It seems we do care how we are seen
And have a public face,
And private one within.
Yet all achievements have value
And we seem to have lost our
Sense of a job well done.
After all there is not one of us who
Does not depend on dust bin men
Road repairers and sewage operatives, but only
Become aware of their worth
When rubbish piles up, pot holes
Are not filled, and much much worse
When the unmentionables flood.
So perhaps we should take pride
In those who serve, and bolster
Their self worth by appreciation.
Societies come and they go based not
So much on higher level thoughts
As underpinning by those who keep our
Streets clean, keep us secure and work
All hours for their fellow men.
To say as much should be said with pride.
(By Christopher Dunn, Kingswood PC)
Glos'shire county split in two
West gets forgotten, East in full view
Romans crossed west without a bridge
Had a joined up county without a hitch
We need a new bridge to have salt in our stew
'Forest' west is to the left, 'Gloshire' east is to the right
Not the normal political perception in sight ?
We need to read Winnie Foleys's 'Forest' tales
For insight into their poverty and our 'fails'
They need our help to improve their plight
Sabrina Severn should not cause a division hit
Unlike human Sabrina who had plenty to split
Arlingham and Westbury used to be merry
First joined by Ceasar then a ferry
Forest folk need us they have real merit
Jo Cox MP was a joiner, do not forget
Got murdered for her beliefs so much fret
JK Rowling was a Forest girl created the Potter fad
Put Dursley on the map, Potter and my 'Gloshire' Dad
He was 'Dunnbledore', her headmaster in his '70's set